【搬运】【转载】AK vs. AR vs. Mosin

Friediceman

由Hetzer于2008年10月27日在mitbbs枪版转发。

看到一片很搞的文章，这版上兄弟们一定喜欢：
http://theammocrate.net/modules.php?name=Jokes&pa=showpage3&pid

AK vs AR
The REAL Data Speaks
From Heads Bunker

There's been the ever present, unending debate over which is best, ARs or AKs. This debate rages on across the internet and in gun shops every day sending bile and bitter insults spewing both ways. This debate has turned fathers against sons, best friends against one another, and, well you get the point. Your host is of the opinion that there are of course pros and cons of each family of rifle, and I refuse to engage in what is "best". As one who loves them all, especially the AK and AR series, I thought I'd pass on some of the knowledge I have gained over the years concerning these wildly different weapons. As a bonus, I'll toss in my knowledge of the third favorite family of weapons at the Bunker, just because they are very popular these days and I often ramble about them.So, here, for the aid of those hammering one another with debate, some unbiased, non-slanted, untainted raw knowledge about the Ak, the AR and the Mosin Nagant.

Stuff you know if you have an AK
Stuff you know if you have an AR
Stuff you know if you have a Mosin Nagant

It works though you have never cleaned it. Ever.
You have $9 per ounce special non-detergent synthetic teflon infused oil for cleaning
It was last cleaned in Berlin in 1945

You are able to hit the broad side of a barn from inside
You are able to hit the broad side of a barn from 600m
You can hit the farm from two counties over

Cheap mags are fun to buy
Cheap mags melt
What's a mag?

Your safety can be heard 300m away
You can silently flip off the safety with your finger on the trigger
What's a safety?

Your rifle comes with a cheap nylon sling
Your rifle has a 9 point stealth tactical suspension system
Your rifle has dog collars

Your bayonet makes a good wire cutter
Your bayonet is actually a pretty good steak knife
Your bayonet is longer than your leg.

You can put a .30" hole through 12" of oak, if you can hit it
You can put one hole in a paper target at 100m with 30 rounds
You can knock down everyone else's target just from the shock wave of your bullet going downrange

When out of ammo, your rifle will nominally pass as a club
When out of ammo, your rifle makes a great whiffle bat
When out of ammo, your rifle makes a supreme war club, pike, boat oar, tent pole, or firewood.

Recoil is manageable, even fun
What's recoil?
Recoil often used to relocate shoulders thrown out by the previous shot.

Your sight adjustment goes to '10', and you've never bothered moving it
Your sight adjustment is incremented in fractions of minute of angle
Your sight adjustment goes to 12 miles and you've actually tried it

Your rifle can be used by any two bit nation's most illiterate conscripts to fight elite forces worldwide
Your rifle is used by elite forces worldwide to fight two bit nations most illiterate conscripts
Your rifle has fought against itself and won every time

Your rifle won some revolutions
Your rifle won the cold war
Your rifle won a pole vault event

You paid $350
You paid $900
You paid $59.95

You buy cheap ammo by the case
You lovingly reload precision crafted rounds one by one.
You dig your ammo out of a farmer's field in Ukraine and it works just fine.

You can intimidate your foe with the bayonet mounted
Your foes laugh when you mount your bayonet
You can bayonet your foe on the other side of the river without leaving the comfort of your hole.

Service life, 50 years
Service life, 40 years
Service Life, 100 years

Its easier to buy a new rifle when you want to change cartridge sizes
You can change cartridge sizes with the push of a couple of pins and a new upper
You believe no real man would dare risk the ridicule of his friends if he suggests there is anything but 762x54r

You can repair your rifle with a big hammer and a swift kick
You can repair your rifle by taking it to a certified gunsmith, it's under warranty!
If your rifle breaks, you buy a new one

You consider it a badge of honor when you get your handguards to burst into flames
You consider it a badge of honor when you shoot a sub-MOA 5 shot group
You consider it a badge of honor when you cycle 5 rounds without the aid of a 2x4

After a long day at the range you relax by watching "Red Dawn"
After a long day at the range you relax by watching "Blackhawk Down"
After a long day at the range you relax by visiting the chiropractor

After cleaning your rifle you have a strong urge for a stiff shot of Vodka
After cleaning your rifle you have a strong urge for hotdogs and Apple Pie
After cleaning your rifle you have a strong urge for shishkabob

You can accessorize your rifle with a new muzzle brake or a nice stock set
Your rifle's accessories are eight times more valuable than your rifle
Your rifle's accessory is a small tin can with a funny lid, but its buried under an apartment building somewhere in Budapest

Your rifle's finish is varnish and paint
Your rifle's finish is Teflon and high tech polymers
Your rifle's finish is low grade shellac, cosmoline and Olga's toe nails.

Your wife tolerates your autographed, framed picture of Mikhail Kalashnikov
Your wife tolerates your autographed, framed picture of Eugene Stoner
You're not sure there WERE cameras to photograph Sergei Mosin

Late at night you sometimes have to fight the urge to hold your rifle over your head and shout "Wolverines!"
Late at night you sometimes have to fight the urge to clear your house, slicing the pie from room to room.
Late at night, you sometimes have to fight the urge to dig a fighting trench in the yard to sleep in.

There you have it. In the end, it is clear to any open minded inquirer, the Mosin Nagant is clearly the most superior weapon or all time, but the AR and the AK come out as a draw when compared side by side. Heh.

thurder

this is hilarious